Tag Archive for: caring

“Can Do” Attitude

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One of the developmentally typical things that happens when your child is about 2 years old is the “No, me do it!” phase.

They REALLY want to do things for themselves. But they get frustrated when it doesn’t go as smoothly as they thought. Their little hands haven’t got the fine motor control that many tasks require.

As they get older, they find more success doing little things.

  • They can put on their own socks.
  • They can open and close doors and drawers.
  • They can pick up their toys. (Notice I said “can” not “will”.)
  • They can feed themselves with spoons and forks.
  • They can even dress themselves.

But… it takes more time for them to do it independently. A task that would take an adult 3 minutes, can take three or four times that. And, their adult will need to be right there as they try their best, as they often get distracted or find they don’t know how to do the task properly, and have an epic meltdown in total frustration.

In our “hurry up” world, it’s much easier and more efficient to do all the tasks ourselves rather than slow down and wait for our preschooler to figure it out by themselves. But one of the most important things we can do is foster independence in our children (at home and at school.)

  • Encourage all their earnest attempts to try new things.
  • Be prepared to offer assistance only when they have already given it their best effort.
  • Build in extra time to allow the task to be completed without everyone losing their minds watching the clock.

I once heard a quote that has stuck with me as I’ve watched all the children in my care grow over the last 46 years. “Competence builds Confidence!” I don’t know who said it. (I’m sorry, if you know who the author is, I’ll be happy to credit them.) And I must say, I’ve found that to be true. With each completed task or activity, each new concept understood or academic achievement accomplished… self-confidence grows. Along with the belief that a child can do even more if they try.

At St. Paul’s Day School we make time… to let children try. To let them practice till they learn a new skill. To give them the encouragement to attempt new and challenging work all in the guise of play. And when they leave us, we cheer their “can do!” attitude and know we’ve given them a foundation of competence that shines with confidence!

 

Pro Tip from Mrs. Ryan

When you know you have to be out of the house quickly… prep ahead of time. Find all the items that need to be worn, transported or made (like snacks or lunches) and put them where they are easily grabbed when the time comes. Set an alarm for 25 minutes before departure and let your child have a 5 minute “heads up”. “We’re going to get ready to go to school in 5 minutes!” Then turn it into fun. Use funny voices, make funny faces, tell them the first one all ready gets to beep the car’s horn or unlock the car with the key fob or sing their favorite song in the car. Having a goal will help them focus!

Who’s Who in the School (Part 3)

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Who has a room that is an office, a meeting space, a library, a Stay N Play space and a place to go to learn about “Thumbs up choices”? Yes, it’s me! Mrs. Liz Ryan.

As the Director of St. Paul’s Day School, I wear many “hats” and have a variety of responsibilities and my office reflects that! But you’ll notice, there are always toys, chairs of “just the right size” (for little people and big people), and a welcoming smile on my face.

One of my favorite things to do each day is greet each family at the car line and say good morning to each child. It’s important to let children know that they are cared for and valued from the moment they get out of their car in the morning to the moment they climb back into their carseat at the end of their day. Are they smiling? Are they tired? Are they excited? Are they anxious? Checking in with each little one and their parent (or grandparent) gives useful information to the teachers and me that we can use to shape our teaching that day. And if my silly earrings or preschool print clothes can coax a smile or a giggle out of a little one who might be unsure, so much the better!

We are blessed to be a small school with three classrooms (and a multi-use room) where each student is treated like an individual and have their needs met. No crowds of children trying to get attention. Enough friends, but not too many children in a class. That allows the teachers to spend time with each child and get to know them well.

Building relationships with the whole family helps a child know that they are part of a loving community. Knowing the names of moms, dads, siblings, grandparents and pets, and creating connections with them, helps us as staff understand the children and their life experiences. And when we become “one big happy family” we can learn about how to succeed in the world! And we do!

I’ve raised three children of my own (two sons and a daughter) and helped raise hundreds of other little ones in my 47 years of working with children. It always makes me smile when “my” little people come back to visit me when they have grown up a bit… whether they are 8, 14, 25 or 48, I am filled with joy because they have all left handprints on my heart!

Along the way, I’ve learned a lot. And around the Day School I have a tendency to share “Pro Tips from Mrs. Ryan!”  Things that will work most of the time that I’ve learned through experience. So this blog seems to be an appropriate place to share them with you. I hope you’ll enjoy them!

 

PRO TIP #1

Mornings can be chaotic and confusing when you are trying to get the family out of the house every day. (Especially with a three or four-year-old in tow!) Finding backpack, folder, lunchbox, sneakers and Show & Tell toy is enough to get everyone snarling and hollering at one another! My Pro Tip is: designate a space you will see on your way out of the house, lay out a placemat or make a rectangle out of tape on the floor and make sure you “put your school friends to bed” for the night before your child goes to sleep. (It should be big enough to hold all the things mentioned above.) In the morning you’ll be set to go without the hassle of having to chase down that left sneaker or find out if the folder is in the car or if the lunchbox has an open container of yogurt inside!

You might even have time for a quick dance party to get everyone smiling!